Dungy, previously Soda Popinski?

 

Tony Dungy’s path to become a leader of men was an unconventional one.  In his teens, he was a feared boxer and the fast lifestyle that ensued led him to hitting the bottle.  Nothing quite dulled the pain after a tough fight like the brown bag.  Dungy’s change of fate occurred while at the seat of the tattoo parlor with his new best buddy Mike Tyson.  Sure he was a little tipsy at the time, but he found himself agreeing with his buddy Mike that the two of them should get tattoos on their face.  “Really?!?! Am I really going to get a tatoo on my face?  A neck tattoo (ala Kenyon Martin) assumes partial mental issues but a tattoo on the face means you’re straight crazy.”  Dungy’s stunning realization of how messed up his life lead him to find Jesus (not Shuttlesworth, sorry Ray)… and the rest is history.

 

Chewbacca Kruk: I’ll Never Love Again

Chewbacca made his debut on public eyes in the 1977 classic sci-fi adventure flick Star Wars: A New Hope. He was instantly adored by audiences and quickly became a fan favorite in the series that would conclude in 1983. After Star Wars: Return of the Jedi, Chewbacca was neither seen nor heard from in the years to follow. In 1986, a young teddy bear resembling chap made an appearance for the San Diego Padres. His name, you ask, was John Kruk. This portly ball player quickly was admired by the San Diego locale, and no one bothered to wonder why. Reasonably so, I compare this phenomenon to hooking up with a past significant other after a break up and after time has passed. In this breakup, a bitter taste was left in your mouth because you still really cared about them. Your feelings returned during the hookup, and it seemed as though everything was back to the way it was. When we come to the realization that it will never be the same, we either hurt more, or finally have a sense of closure for good. When Chewie left us in 1983, we wanted more, we needed more. He returned to us to play the American pastime, but left us again in 1995. We felt raped and pillaged by his actions; we were torn on the inside. When news was announced that Chewie would be back to his Millennium Falcon driving ways, our hearts skipped a beat. But after leaving the theater after just watching Star Wars: The Phantom Menace , i knew we were never meant to be together. You betrayed us with that shitty movie; you cheated us, Chewie!

Sorry, Reggie.

Carlton Banks: Where 18-1 Happens….And It Doesn’t Mean Shit

Is it coincidence that Rodney Harrison was suspended for 4 games for Human Growth Hormone injections in 2007 after being ridiculed year in and year out for his striking resemblance to the physically challenged undersized cousin of Will Smith on The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air? I remember a particular episode where Will was the star of the basketball team, and Carlton’s (Alfonso) jealousy coupled with Will’s greed led to the downfall of the squad. Is it possible that the two are actually one entity??? If so, did Rodney/Alfonso’s greed carry over from their devastating loss and fill the hearts of fellow Patriots this season with that same greed? 18-1 is an amazing record if you win the Super Bowl, Rodney/Alfonso, but worrying about an undefeated season before the Super Bowl is a foolish move. But then again dancing to Tom Jones and having a gambling addiction to quarter slots are also foolish things…sorry Rodney/Alfonso, the majority of you’re life is filled with shameful moments, and now that you’ve been exposed, things don’t seem to be getting better any time soon.

Courage or HGH?

The career path of a professional baseball player takes many twists and turns.  Rarely does a major league player get there without facing adversity.  The story of Mark Mcgwire is no exception and takes adversity to a whole new level.  Mark struggled with his courage and instead of going through the minor leagues, he had to follow a yellow brick road to prepare himself for the majors.  Once he reached the Emerald City, he was met my a wizard who gave him the ultimate advice….HGH and steroids. Was it worth it Mark? Too bad the Lion was afraid of needles….                       

Earl The Duck

It turns out that the laser beam that famously brought us the cigar smoking, crime fighter Howard The Duck also delivered an exceptionally mediocre NBA point guard. The similarity in their appearance is undeniable.            

Sam Cassell: The Real Story

Surely we aren’t the first group of sports fans to liken Sam Cassell’s appearance to an Alien but we have uncovered the truth behind these comparisons. At birth the Mon Calamari community knew that there was something different about these two twins. At birth, it was clear that Sam would grow far taller than the average 5ft 10 Mon Calamari and that this anomaly would lead to a career outside of their planet. Sam, always being the greedier of the two, knew that his future wasn’t in helping the rebel alliance defeat the empire but rather leading the Houston Rockets to two NBA championships as well as being one of the leagues most notorious shoot-first point guards. You can find out more information on Sam Cassell’s species here.      

Avram Grant or Jabba The Hut?

We were recently watching Chelsea FC’s pathetic loss to Championship side Barnsley in the FA Cup. Whenever the camera showed Chelsea’s new coach Avram Grant we couldn’t help but notice his likeness to a famous character in the Star Wars (1977) series. We did some research and discovered that Avram Grant was the inspiration for Jabba the Hut’s character in the 1983 film , “Return of The Jedi”.

The Experiment

This is THE blog for professional athlete look a likes. We are a group of four students at DePauw University who are avid sports fans. During our hours of watching NBA and English Premier League Soccer we find ourselves constantly finding humorous comparisons between professional athletes and other popular figures. We will be adding comparisons each day in an attempt to become the go-to blog for athlete look a likes.